Ramblings in Retrospect: 02.05

By Bethany from iamknittogether.blogspot.com

Lydia - 1710g (3 lbs 12 oz) Penny - 1110 (2 lbs 7 oz)

Today has brought very little change for the girls, but that's ok. We stayed at home last night and slept in this morning and then there as a shower for the girls this afternoon. There's nothing like a party just to give you presents to make a girl feel special! Plus, we're one step closer to being ready to bring these little rascals home!

Lydia is still growing strong. She's still having reflux issues but that is easily taken care of by us holding her during and after feeds. That sure is rough. She's getting closer everyday to being able to go home, and honestly that scares us to death!

Penny has remained stable today, which is a relief. Basically everything that's wrong with her right now is fixable and she's on the right medicines to fix it. The cultures from her PICC line and ET (ventilator) tube are growing something that's not identified yet but she's already been started on antibiotics so that is covered. Her bilirubin is still high but she's on the medicine to help process the excess, so that's covered. Her lungs are either steady or improving because she's requiring less oxygen on her ventilator settings. Don't tell her, but she's been on "room air" (21% O2) for good stretches of time! The past few days she's been very lethargic but seems to have a little bit of her spunk back today which makes me feel better. She's our little spunky monkey!

Jonathan and I are doing well, although we had a funny realization last night on the way home. There's something in my heart that still feels like these girls aren't mine. Yesterday someone commented on a Facebook picture that one of them looked like me. In my mind I laughed and thought "well that can't be, they're adopted!" Ok, before you start calling Lakeside to have me committed, I realized that my distended abdomen for the past months was more than just a large lunch or an unfortunate digestive malfunction. I realize that Jonathan and I were used by God to create 2 precious girls....there's just a disconnect in my head between me being larger than average and these babies. Blame it on the anesthesia for the c-section, or the fact that barely any of this experience so far has been a natural mother/child bonding scenario, but that's that. Jonathan feels it too...so I'm not crazy (-er than you thought I was before). In trying to figure out what it is, we at least figured out what it feels like. It feels like we're on a mission trip. We've gone to this different environment, separated from friends and family. We're dedicating all of our time and energy to help out people we barely know. We're sleeping in less than ideal settings. We're using public showers. We're making lifelong friends with people we just met (the nurses and doctors here). And there's a part of us that expects this to be over and to go back home to our regular lives, changed, but back to normal. Of course this isn't the case, and we know that in our heads. But our hearts are a still a little confused. Technically, as with the girl's development, we have about 6 more weeks before this was supposed to sink in. Maybe we'll get it all straight by then.

Specific Prayer

Penny's lung function to improve enough for her to be extubated (PLEASE)
Penny's liver function to be normal and for this bilirubin issue to be short lived and because of the TPN
Penny's possible infections to be minor and short lived as well
Lydia's continued growth and development
Lydia's protection from germs (colds, respiratory etc) as she's out of her isolated bed more
Lydia's reflux to be either reduced or obvious enough to medicate

Thank you all so very much for your prayers. It truly is an honor to be prayed for so faithfully.